By no means do I write this as an authority on the subject. It's more an attempt to define and refine for myself what works in my experience, and to outline the tools at one's disposal for writing what I deem to be good poetry/lyrics. Writing poetry and lyrics is a pastime I enjoy. I'm not a published nor professional poet or lyricist, but I've done a lot of it. I'm self published here on the internet, but so is everybody, right? This doesn't count or amount to a hill of beans.
What I outline here is firstly my opinion, and applies equally to both formats. I'd guess the only real soft-set difference between the two is that lyrics are often written to be more accessible and straightforward, and typically deal with somewhat shallow thoughts and experiences - other people, emotions, love, loss, sex, desire, money, fame, status, etc. When I say accessible, I mean phrased in the normal manner of speech, using everyday words and expressions, even slangy language and buzz words unique to a genre .
In my opinion, the pitfalls of most poetry and lyrics are the following attributes:
- Straightforward and artless
- Simple - Unsophisticated simple words, and hard rhymes
- Trite, it lacks nuance and overuses hard rhymes, and trite words and ideas(cliches).
- Lacking the depth, subtlety, ambiguity, and layers of interpretation
- Lacking variety or originality, too formulaic.
- Hackneyed or Immature ideas or words.
- Incohesive ideas or statements.
- It says a lot about nothing and is insipid, vacuous, and obtuse (dull)
Here's an example of the use of cliches and simple hard rhymes:
"You came from the clouds above
on the wings of a dove
filling my heart with love
you held me with your love glove"
That's pretty a straightforward simple square verse. It has a symmetric meter between the outer lines and the inner lines. It employs hard rhyming, using the same rhyme in the traditional end spot, and is void of any other rhyming techniques, except for the hard double rhyme at the end of the last line, and the weak rhyme symmetry between the You at the beginning of the first and last line. It's full of cliches and uses a straightforward meter ... and sounds a bit juvenile and sappy, right?
For me, the best rhymes (if you choose to rhyme at all, or even use meter - we'll get to that later on), are those which are more unique, nuanced, and subtle. I especially love weak and nontraditional rhymes.
Here then, in no particular order, are the elements for achieving more sophisticated and interesting poetry and lyrics. This list is not comprehensive as there may be more that just doesn't come to mind at the moment. This is a first draft after all.
RHYMES:
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1. Branch out - You're not required to rhyme only the end of a line. You can also rhyme the front and middle of a line. Or you can use any combination of the three. Middle rhymes, front end rhymes, and rear end rhymes are all acceptable rhyming methods. For example:
"My dingbat cat caught a fat rat,
and brought it into my bed dead."
I know, hard rhymes and trite, but it gets the idea across ... and notice the inner rhymes and alliterations - caught and brought, and the short A alliteration through the first line. So maybe it's not so terribly trite. But, to an average person it would sound trite and juvenile with the simple words and the hard rhymes.
2. As with lines, you can also rhyme the front and middle of a word. Front and middle rhymes are considered weak, with front rhymes being the weakest, unless used alliteratively. The human ear pays more attention to the ending sounds of words and sentences.
3. In a stanza, you don't need to rhyme the end of every line with the same rhyme. This is something that feels dull and overdone ... and something I do that I need to do less often.
4. You can use alliteration (repeating the same beginning vowel or consonant sound 2-3-4...times in a row). Alliteration is a great form of rhyme.
5. You can use what I call vowel alliteration - i.e
"a statement they made
making lemonade"
Is a 6 word vowel alliteration all words having the long A sound ... and is also a metered rhyme, each line having 5 syllables, and also includes the traditional hard end rhyme.
It can also be interpreted with nuance, i.e., did the person make a "lemonade" statement (statements made to make a bad situation seem better) while actually making lemonade (ironic), or does the line mean that the statement they made was a "lemonade" type expression (metaphor)? This rhyme is a good example of creating layers by using multiple techniques.
6. Weak rhymes are more subtle and feel more sophisticated - less grade schooly or Suessian. These usually consist of rhyming the front or middle sound of a word without the end of the word rhyming. Front or middle line rhymes are not as weak as word rhymes unless they contain weak rhyming words - that said front rhymes, all things being equal, are the weakest. Here are some examples:
By bliss I was tricked to take the bait,
as this was a thing I'd never trade"
"and drives the right for saviors.
Men love the might of war"
"You I could never constrain
A wild need to take, consume"
In these examples of weak rhymes, the first is the strongest. The last two are weaker, the last rhyme being weakest with its front rhyme on the end words (remember front end rhymes are the weakest). However there is some slight rhyming between never and need, and I and Wild. The the end rhyme of the middle is strong or weak depending on how 'saviors' is pronounced, but s at the end weakens
the OR rhyme, but it makes up for this with the inner rhyme, thus becoming a stronger pairing than the last couplet, and challenging the first couplet for top spot.
Perfect rhymes are strong, and perfect rhyming of multiple syllables is the strongest of all: dedicate, medicate, meditate; deny, defy, belie, rely; oppose, suppose, upped nose, etc.
7. Putting rhyming words in unsymmetrical spots between lines can make them "feel" connected and rhymey. Unsymmetrical means the rhymes don't occur at the same point in each phrase.
8. Combining different rhyming techniques can give your work layers and sophistication. Besides, anything done too much can start to feel trite and hackneyed. Mix it up.
9. Use nuance, ambiguity, and vagueness. Write lines or entire stanzas that can be interpreted in multiple ways, depending on the listener's interpretation. Try not to be overt by telling the listener exactly what to think. Example:
"If anything goes wrong
don't call it broke.
Life's one big happy accident.
It might be a joke,
take it so."
Does this mean it's a funny joke you are being told, or a mean joke being played on you? Ambiguity is achieved by not qualifying the word 'joke'. Are they to "take it" positively or negatively? The stanza will be interpreted according to the listener's frame of mind.
10. Don't feel compelled to rhyme every line. Avoiding this also adds a feel of sophistication and lessens the Suessian effect. You can mix different rhymes in a stanza, even separate them in occurrence so that they don't feel so blatant - like rhyming the first and last lines of a stanza, or separating two pairs of rhyming lines with a line that rhymes with neither, or maybe rhymes with an inner word in each couplet.
11. Don't be afraid to break symmetry, either in meter, or in line rhyming structure. You don't need to stick to a set meter, or a set rhyme structure - both between stanzas and within stanzas. But be aware that these things help a piece feel more cohesive.
13. Use simile, metaphor, ambiguity, multiple meaning, contradiction, and irony.
14. Use unorthodox and uncommon words both in your rhymes and in your lines, but be careful as this can sound clunky, pompous, tumescent, bombastic, and sesquipedalian. <--see what I did there? I love self contradictory statements like this in a sentence and try to do it in my rhymes, at times :)
15. When or if you get stuck, don't be afraid to use a rhyming dictionary, or a thesaurus. There are some really good ones online, and it's not cheating. Be aware however that every rhyming dictionary I've seen only listed perfect end rhymes, and did not include all the perfect rhymes I could think of, but it's still a good start-up when stuck.
16. Use drama to create dynamic. Switch from happy parts to sad parts, light parts to heavy parts, meek parts to bold parts - give the entire piece an overall arc or pattern of movement - moving the energy or mood up or down.
17. My favorite thing to do is to match a rhyme between lines word for word - it's not easy either, especially to end up with anything that makes sense. I love it for the difficulty level. However, this can typically sound overblown and very Dr. Suessian, i.e. Juvenile, especially if using very simple rhymes.
18 - Read poetry and listen closely to lyrics. Make note of things you find interesting, artistic or well put/expressed. Listen as well for things that feel clunky or stupid. You can learn a lot by critical analysis and close attention to the work of others.
19. Strive to improve your lexicon (all the words you know and use) and your ken (all the things you know). For me, lexicon was greatly improved by poring over an extensive dictionary and recording on a study sheet every word I did not know. It is imperative to have many words at your disposal when composing - at least imperative in my opinion. Improve your ken by researching the topic or theme on which you're writing.
20. Mix it up - besides adding more sophistication to your work, the inclusion of these methods, especially the use of weak rhymes, alliteration, front, inner, and outer rhyming both in words and line will give you more choices with which to work, expanding upon the available words at your disposal, and making it easier and more fluid and flexible.
Rhymeless Verse:
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1. Some people, mostly aesthetes and critics, feel that the height of sophistication is rhymeless verse.
2. Much of what I said within the rhyming section can be applied to this section, just leave out the rhymes. Also if you go too far afield with the concepts of the previous section you'll end up with pretty much rhymeless verse.
3. Rhymeless verse can depend on repeated meter or use no meter at all. In both of these cases it becomes more important to state something of depth or meaning, and to use uncommon expressions or words, metaphor, simile, irony, etc. Otherwise it isn't poetry.
4. Of course in music you can slap any words together to express your mind/message and let the music carry all the artistry.
One Last Note:
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As a byproduct of my bipolar illness, I hear rhymes in almost everything - especially when I'm manic, or hypomanic. It gets to a point where I can't stop rhyming stuff - both in my head and in my speech. This behavior is called "Clanging", and at its height it feels like torture, as I can't shut it off ( I wrote a song about it - Titled "The Rhymes"
http://onetomany.weebly.com/uploads/6/4/0/2/6402337/11_onetomany_the_rhymes_db-vocs.mp3
http://onetomany.weebly.com/uploads/6/4/0/2/6402337/11_the_rhymes_lyric.txt
The last section of that text I included the poem which I used to get the lyric. I wrote it while hypomanic and experiencing a heavy onslaught of clanging.
As a result, even when normal I hear rhymes in sentences that most people would say do not rhyme. For example, the following phrase rhymes to me:
"Scattered random truthiness statements"
Say it - do you hear all the esses, and hard Ts? The short A in the first two words are alliterative. The last two words have an alliteration with the short E, which for me creates a nice symmetry to the sentence - See, IT RHYMES! As does "Symmetry in the sentence". ;) But like the tree in the forest, does it matter if no one else hears it? I think it does as it lends another layer of depth with the hidden secrets, even if I'm the only one who knows the secret. :)
I express this here to let you know I am an overt rhymer meaning that although I mix it up, I have a tendency to layer my work very thickly. Overall this tends to create an in your face, somewhat heavy handed piece. But as with all art, you gotta do what suits you and best expresses yourself. I state this to put emphasis on making judicious choices, and keeping in mind a "less is more" approach - advice mostly I give to myself.
At some point in the near future I plan to put up all my poetry on my website here:
http://onetomany.weebly.com/poetry.html
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